meeehhhish

nothingness.

that is all life seems to be.

a ball of nothingness.

                                  I thought it may be grand at one singular point.


                                        I was wrong as can be.



            tar. tar. tar.

                         take me to another
                               bar. bar. bar.

(stop)

hands,
whet with desire,
a desire,
I cannot provide.

                                      wet.
                                covered in drool.
                          a pool of bloody gooey drool.

vomit once agin. 

so sick. 

can't stop. 

              why is this happening to me ...? 

I miss being normal. 

hands,

wet with bile. 

                    make it go away. 

make it all disappear. 

                                  the horniness,

                                     the ailments. 

                                         the self loathing. 

          

      

                                                                       Please. 

make it all stop. 

;!

                  monsters collide
                      somewhere inside.


                                   their scare tactics begin mindfully.





          drip,
         drip,
            drip...


                       blood down the back of my head.
         

                                   black goo.
                                        .. ... I never completed the journey.

the monsters

come for me. ...

they are a part of me. 

they are me. 

I am them. 

keep your mouth shut when you're talking to me

            sleeves over my mouth
keep the spit from dripping
                                     on my chin. ..


                  keep it shut,
          keep the words inside.

I tried. 

I tired, 

Silence.

                    mind floods, 

                          overbears. 

                                the words tare,

                                       a silent tear.. 

                                               it is all too much to bare. 

   

No. 1

Mush beneath my bare feet,

a growth, 

a breadth, 

a thought. 

Silence swirls through the air,

its energy, 

its flight, 

its purpose. 

Blind from all senses.

Become some thing. 

Fall into some one. 

And it all melts away.